I Never Liked Early Mornings

In fact, I would have sworn I was allergic to them. I've always been such a night owl, preferring to clean the house or work on music (or come up with my best creative ideas) after 10 pm. But not so much lately.

Oh, I will still get up in the middle of the night sometimes and make notes about things I have to do or people I need to call. Jot down ideas when they come to me. If I can't fall back to sleep I will blog or write or check email. But lately, these early mornings are something more. Quiet time. Those "still" moments before the sun is up all to myself when I can gather my thoughts and plan for the day with a warm cup of tea in my hands. Instead of dreading the mornings, I am starting to embrace them for all the beauty they can hold.

Life has been busy lately. Since September, really just a whirlwind of activities. A lot of fall fun, family visits and birthdays. Halloween decorating, party planning, field trips, and play dates. But at the same time there have been some changes around here, too. Namely, me going back to work and Ruby having nightmares again. And with that comes lack of sleep for all of us. (Those, BTW, are not the mornings I find bliss). Mind you, I am not away that often for work. My day gigs are usually 7-3 or 7-5 so a few mornings a week Jeff will take her to school and also pick her up. I also have one band rehearsal a week from 7-9ish. She LOVES her Daddy time and is great for him. She goes down now without me there (once for Jeff this week, and once for my mom last week when I did my singing gig in the city and we were both out). Outwardly, she's been GREAT. But inwardly, she is feeling unsure again, crying my name out at night and needing me to be near. She slept with me 3 times this week. Poor thing. I hate that she worries I won't be there. Of course, we talk about it during the day and she puts on her brave face. I tell her it's okay to miss me, but to remember I ALWAYS come back and never will go away for long. Just a few hours here and there. Oh, but there is one overnight this week. Ugg. But anyway, I guess this is all normal for her age (and circumstance) and it will continue to get easier. I mean, look how far we have come from a year ago?

I am finding lately that going back to simple things helps me keep the balance. We found a new church. I started yoga again this week. I am cooking/baking a little more. Decorating for fall. Instead of trying to come up with all these super-mom activities for after school, I am simply talking and playing on the floor with her or making up silly games together and singing songs. Being in the moment. We went to a local apple orchard yesterday with her class and she came home early with me. It was such an awesome day. We just laughed and cuddled and tickled and played. Just wanna bottle up days like that.

Sure we are still crafting and we both love it. Have her Halloween pumpkin crafts hanging all over the walls. She's so proud and drug her grandparents around the room almost upon arrival to show them her art. It's so cute. Today we are gonna make black glitter bats and hang them all over the place. Doing a small Halloween party next weekend for some of her old school mates we don't get to see anymore. Should be a real fun time. Ruby was really excited when I told her we would have her friends (from last year) come over. They were all so close.

Well, I hear the husband stirring. The dog is up and the cat is at my feet. Soon, the little miss will join in on the morning procession. Time to grab a cup a'Joe and get this party started!