Thursday, March 1, 2012

The Luckiest Mom On The Planet

That's how I am feeling right now. What a moment I just had with Ruby. We went through our bedtime routine and turned out the lights. I lay with her every night until she falls asleep. She knows I will go, but just wants me there for awhile. I hold her close and she falls asleep. Then I slip out.  It's our new routine. She played with her favorite bear for a bit before settling down tonight. She said the bear was so happy cause he loved his family and friends. So sweet, I thought. So darn sweet.

I gently reminded her it was time to quiet down and get some sleep. "Ok, Momma."  Silence. "Momma?" she says. "Yes, honey?" I reply. "I love you soooo much!" Pause for thought... "a LOT". A huge smile washed over me. I tell her how much I love her, too, and snuggle in a little closer. She is shifting still and I can tell she's not ready to sleep, but I ask her to try again. She says (sweetly), "I try but I just thinking about my family". So we talk a little more. We talk about the weekend and how Grandma is coming. She is happy about this. I remind her that she slept in her own bed all week and we are sooo proud of her. I also remind her that she gets "dirt" ice cream for being so good. She says to me "Mommy, I crying happy tears. Yes, look...I did".  She's never done this before. Tears are usually for meltdowns or boo boos. I almost want to laugh cause I think it's because of the ice cream. But she turns to me...and her eyes are teary. I say "why the happy tears, sweetheart?" and she replies "cause I love my family!" Well, you can guess what happened next! Yup. I start crying, too. I said to her "well, now look, Mommy's crying happy tears now, too".  I tell her how much I love her. How I dreamed of having a daughter for so long and how she is much much MORE than I could have ever dreamed. We looked at each other then - teary eyed mother and daughter - and just stared for a few seconds. And then we laughed as I exclaimed what silly girls we are. She thought that was funny, too, and we had a good long giggle and hug. A few minutes more and she rolled over and fell fast asleep. But I laid there a bit longer. Staring at the sweet kid I have been blessed to call daughter. Saying the prayer I say every day and every night....thanking God for sending her into our lives and our hearts. I am so so grateful and beyond words to explain how I feel. It was such a moment. I had to jot it down here so I never ever forget it.

7 comments:

Wendy said...

Awwwwww....what a sweet little angel you have!

JOY said...

Sobbing. Just put my 3-month-old girl down to bed. I can't wait until she's old enough to cry happy tears... and yet I'll miss my little baby when's she's that old!

Jay and Chandra and Penny Regan said...

Ah, gee! Now you got me crying happy tears and making it hard to see what I'm typing here. Wow! What a blessing!

Maci Miller said...

Thanks, sweet ladies for your comments. Oh, they grow up so fast!

Ellie said...

sweet, sweet ruby! i just love to hear her thoughts. she really is a deep thinker, jen :) love that little girl!

Jessica said...

Ruby has the sweetest spirit. Isn't it funny that we imagined it and dreamed it and waited for it not knowing that what we were waiting for was beyond all possible imaginings?

Mireille said...

You know we LOVE Ruby, but she crept into my heart even a bit more after hearing this!! She made ME cry happy tears!! She is one special little lady!!